Mr-Picketts Reviews (part 2)

5.

6.

I will not…

  1. ask my mechanic to rotate my car’s tires just because it’s been 5,000 km since the last time he forgot to actually put in those new spark plugs
  2. speak my mind in front of religious fanatics just because I think their god is funny that way when he dropped brimstone on those poor degenerates
  3. be tempted to watch “The Shining” just because it’s on the telly since Shelly Duvall is still there
  4. tidy my desk just because you are obsessing again about finding the stuff you put there for me to sign last week
  5. move my car from this driveway just because I might possibly be blocking someone in the next five minutes who isn’t here yet
  6. try expressing sexually oriented humor just because I’ve had that extra glass of Pinot just so we could finish the bottle
  7. make lemonade just because god (who is also funny that way) gave me lemons
  8. attempt to lead a charge up a steep hill into musket-fire just because I feel for the plight of those poor negroe slaves
  9. leave partial facial hair on my chin just because it’s been three days since the last razoring and I might look more like a poet if I did
  10. waste another half hour researching approaches to dialectical materialism just because I think the school teacher might be impressed
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